“Bläh, and bläh again…”
I have not been feeling all too well the last couple of months. A lot happened. Trauma, pain, grief, loss, guilt, doubt, remorse... So many tears have been shed, so many nightmares have been had, and I am afraid, the end of the sadness and pain is not in sight just yet...
I understand that a part of my suffering I'm self-inflicting... I can't seem to let go of certain feelings, I keep going back to some of the worst memories, and I know it won't change a single thing, I just can't release these feelings, these bad memories, from my mind. 😢 And when I try to, when I almost succeed at times even, something happens that triggers these emotions and memories again. Like I'm not "allowed" to let the bad things be and go leave them behind, giving me a chance to focus on the positive...
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https://cynnisblog.wordpress.com/2025/09/29/blah-and-blah-again/