@iamada I bridged this with a simple automation. This e-mail geta sent to me every morning by a LLM. It has basic info about why people might hate me. By doing so I eliminate the fear and it gets ridiculous because I stsrt arguing against it why this is not true. Like externalizing the self-hate instance to a stupid LLM since it is exactly as smart as an LLM. Not very.

This is just a conceptual idea, I did not do it really.

@liztai The scope of the usefulness of LLMs is slowly revealing itself after being covered in the fog of toxic marketing. Processes that need to be mentally walked by our brains can not be done by linguistic pattern machines. The process is the important cognitive part. Anything else that is rather cumbersome and boring can be automated, as it already could with the conventional pre-LLM software. The word "pattern" is so much more accurate than "intelligence" when we think of laugage models.

All under the pressure of hours, not days until we stand in front of the customers presenting. I have to be their boss even if I don't want to. The alternative is presenting really fucked up bad projects and potentially losing customers.

The unsolved questions are: How not to dominate people when they get the zoomies while their eyes are shut? On a busy street. And how not to burn out in the process of compensating for them? How to help them to self-manage?

I really don't know. (5/5)

The difficult part is that I am pressured to be a project manager in otherwise flat hierarchies. I have to make sure their memory window stays intact and they don't lose focus. This wouldn't be necessary if it wasn't projects with real customers we commited to help. The responsibility kicks in and I macro/micro manage, do quality assurence, communication, track correction, finalisation and presentation. (4/5)

I love my people and would never break up elements of our relationships over work stuff. I am eager to find solutions here. (3/5)

I work with other neurodivergent people. Some of them have weak memory. And no Markdown note, no project management tool has been helpful to make sure they do not forget what their and my tasks are, what next steps are and where on the project journey we are located. This results in responsibility diffusion, lost time, shitty work, in rare cases missed deadlines. (2/5)

Struggling with coop #work on limited context persistence. No, this not about LLMs, it's about humans.

I have fluctuating abilities to remember stuff as my brain works in bursts of eruptive productivity followed by not being able to shower and eat. I'm talking 3 days of work in 2 hours level of productivity. #AuDHD is a curious way of existing. I rely heavily on self-documentation e.g. a #PKM system. (1/5)

Yet there is also a part in the workflow which I couldn't care less about having to do it manually, which is setting up folder structures, preparing work spaces. I can do this already. There is no need to train myself so I happily instruct my stochastic parrots to do the boring stuff. Again the guardrail here is me being able to verify it is doing things right. (4/4)

I used an LLM to help me build a simple static site generator while I took a shit. This was not possible some years ago. But this is not the news here. It's something else.

I have strong conceptual understanding of infotech but an extremely difficult relationship to actually learning programming due to neurodivergence.

#llm #code #ai #opencode (1/4)

Known caveat is a complexity collapse and hallucinations which is why I never step out of the area where I still can read and vaguely understand what the code does.

In this small scope between knowing what I know and knowing what I don't know this kind of assisted coding really helps me out. Believe it or not. (3/4)

A LLM that can write and annotate code from my fuzzy instructions and explain me why it does stuff, turns out to be a fun way to bridge my disability.

Now you may think, duh another vibe coder. And you are right for the moment. But here is my approach: I do not use it as a replacement for for human skill but as a guidance for developing human skill. An interactive tutorial. I want the LLM to be obsolete. (2/4)

I need to vent. The numerous christmas meet ups with family and frends are over. But they had a massive price on my energy.

I worked on my projects way up until Christmas Eve. I have already been running on my last energy for weeks. I finished my projects and went immediately into celebrations, five of them. The struggle to mask during these days was extreme and rare.

I am mentally so exhausted that even my inner narratives of who I am are seemingly broken.

I feel empty
#autism #adhd #audhd

Pissed about a friend telling me that I behaved like typical "male-socialized" people.

I apoligized in advance for sounding robotic and strange in a former convo. The person pathologized it as "being anxious and insecure". Which was not exactly my point.

I felt the urge to specify and differentiate. I was not anxious, just cautious. The person decided that my over-reassurence and explainstion is typical "male-socialized" denial of personal issues.

🙌 Bitch, I have #Autism!

#nb

Boring rigid Android without Google sprinkles on top felt like an army-grade tactical machine. Not interesting. Not passionate. Custom launchers and widgets are your friend in these lonely digital forests.

Fragile jelly for all its visual appeal and playfulness is just not in any way better. Take away the snappiness since these GPU numbers have to be crunched somewhere and you have me in a situation where I miss my tactical machine. (7/8)

I ordered a refurbished Pixel 9 Pro XL and will install GrapheneOS on it, port my stuff over to it and try to live 7 days in the Android jungle.

This is how bad iOS 26 is!

Anyone else triggered massively by jellyOS? (8/8)

Last time I stopped counting visual bugs was the transition from Android 12 to 13. SystemUI crashed more often than I got a message from my mom at some point. This and being on GrapheneOS that has security as its main goal kinda made sense. It got refined and stable over time. It was a boring but functional interface. In fact it has not changed ever since. Looks an feels the same. (6/8)

Visual clutter was easily removed by coloring icons all in the same tint and getting rid of the labels. What a time to be alive, right? iOS 18 was a real improvement.

Customisation is not just gimmicky fashion. It's a way of self-care. Especially when you have sensory and attention issues. (3/8)

the iPhone says, rubbing jellyfish into my strained eyes. And it's not like I am refusing to touch the jelly. It's just that it behaves fragile. I have stopped counting the bugs. (5/8)

Now we have the hot mess of iOS26 that feels like these demos of an undergrad CSS weekend course for graphic designers that serves the educational purpose of showing all that is visually possible. Only it is one of the world's most important user interfaces. Giving us nausea, making the content hard to read because it gets in your and its own way trying to conform to its own overcomplicated pseudo-skeuomorphism. "Look what I can do!" (4/8)

“It seems like you’re missing a masculine father figure in your life.”

Bitch, believe me, I am not missing it. At all. What I am missing is you shutting up with your kitchen table psychology bullshit.

People grow strong around strong characters, not gender roles.

#nb #enby #nonbinary #gender