I just made seven-minute frosting for the hundredth time, and I'm only just now realizing that I've never timed it.

In Mexico, when you’re exhausted, we say "ando más exprimido que un limón de fonda" and I think that’s beautiful.

@zompus ORANGE RICKY

She and my wife talked about it last night. This is her first time doing this. She said "what if I get into trouble?" Wife assured her that it is possible that you could get in trouble in school for doing this, but we will have your back 100%. If you mean it enough to risk a detention for it, go raise your voice for us all.

Daughter took part in a school walkout protest today. I don't want to post pics because I want to protect her, so just imagine a really awesome and beautiful young woman carrying a sign that says "no one is illegal on stolen land" with ICE crossed out in the middle, just being fabulous and amazing, and that's my wonderful baby girl.

9
Barker: what about you, mary?
Mary Shelley: nothing dries up a pussy faster than a man who tells jokes
Barker: oof harsh words!
Shelley: if percy told a joke, i would fucking kill him
Barker: ok fair
Barker: what about byron?
Shelley: no actually byron is pretty funny, i'd let him get away with it

8
Barker: how bout the rest of you ladies? how many of you like jokes?
Anne Rice: well, lestat has a very good sense of humor, in addition to being a genius polyglot and having a huge dong
Barker: okay sure
Rice: also one time he went to the moon
Barker: yeah okay sure
Rice: and also
Barker: moving on

"I've lived seven lifetimes, and I have never had a friend quite like you."
#StarTrek :DS9:

To the pest control guy who is currently doing exterior service on our house:

I am sorry that I forgot you were coming. I would not have subjected you to witnessing me taking a meeting on timezone handling while dressed only in my boxer briefs, if I had not forgotten. But yes, if I read the question in your eyes correctly, I have been working out

I miss Swatch Internet Time. That was so useful https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Swatch_Internet_Time

https://mltshp.com/p/1RJR7 “👀”

Lovely tribute to Deep Space Nine and Avery Brooks in the latest Starfleet Academy. If it's your bag, check it out.

If instead you feel a burning need to tell me why I'm wrong to enjoy either series, rest yourself, Howard. I already know.

Software "engineering" is such a flavor-of-the-month, fad-driven enterprise, and the JavaScript people are by far the worst about it.

What the actual fuck is wrong with Gavin Newsom (rhetorical)

Society: Be polite. Work hard, and you might be rewarded.

Some jackass: What if I’m a dickwad?

Society: Well obviously that gets you everything

@middleclasstool WORST TIMELINE istg

@mothninja you okay, babe?

@TheBreadmonkey @rjblaskiewicz @sanpan

You eventually start seeing it everywhere

@cobalt123 Jesus, a 1ct tanzanite that deep colored would be a decent chunk of change. That much rough must cost a fuckin mint